My father always told me that patience is a virtue. However, the new Avatar film made me decide there was never a statement more incorrect. I would rather have my fingernails pulled out for hours as opposed to being forced to watch Avatar: The Way of Water.

   James Cameron directed this film, the original Avatar, and Titanic. Each film attempts to replace story with money; he seems to believe that by throwing cash at a problem, it fixes it. To the average viewer, the visuals are stunning enough to distract, but to someone who’s a little more analytical and slightly more critical, the film falls apart in an instant.

   Avatar: The Way of Water begins with a half-hour of plot. It ends with another forty-five minutes of plot. What’s in between? An hour and a half of watching blue people swim. Beautiful scenes, amazing CGI. There’s no denying that it’s a technological masterpiece.

   However, it took everything in my soul to stop myself from falling asleep. It’s approximately three hours and fifteen minutes and about an hour of that is necessary. I’d describe the plot, but there is none. I’d describe the characters, but this film is a void of everything that cinema should be.

   It fails to evoke emotion, it fails to interest the audience, and those that I viewed the film with were desperately waiting from the ending. About sixty percent of the movie is exposition, and I can only imagine what the sequels will be like. 

   At the end of the day, this is a movie I cannot imagine rewatching in my life. The only thing memorable about this was the pain I went through while watching. The plot isn’t half-baked, there isn’t even batter. 

   Blockbusters are becoming more and more common, gaining more and more money, and becoming more awful by the day. The success of Avatar: The Way of Water hints to one thing and one thing only: the upcoming death of cinematic storytelling.

Rating:1/5