Hey, you, with the wonderfully prevalent career plans they question.  

The chronically online. 

The singular gay cousin. 

The student, and only that or a boyfriend-haver. 

The best icebreaker player in, arguably, the entire family. 

The politically worried and ill.

The exhausted and the hopeful. 

The sparkly being that will be okay this holiday season, all others, all summers— all of life. 

   I have come to enjoy films that cater to us. Ironically enough, though, some have little to do with our holiday seasons. That was okay to me. I hope it is for you, too. I found those films scarily fitting. 

They are generally about the thriving of a stressed species. The recovery from our semi-universally challenging experiences as humans interacting with others, those having our same existential deal in different colors. We can take ourselves as our own while acknowledging our surrounding messy table. That will always be our gift. 

I am not one to know the dinners at your table, reader, but I am always open to it. Just know that I at least feel the need to recommend you to brilliant cinema.

Consider this a love letter for all whose ability and specialness go unnoticed this December.  

This article does contain spoilers, though I left as many parts of the film a surprise as possible. 

Shiva, Baby (2020) 

   Emma Segilman made her directorial debut in the realest way possible. This psychological thriller is set at a get-together during a Shiva period, a seven-day mourning period in Jewish tradition after the burial of a loved one. Teenage protagonist Danielle (Rachel Sennott), an attendee, does not quite remember the deceased being. But she takes on an additional tragedy of her own. 

   She soon realized her initially bitter ex-girlfriend, Maya (Molly Gordon), is also an attendee. Maya makes it a point to make her presence known and to remind Danielle of their time as a couple. All the while, Danielle continues to navigate familial pressure. Older relatives criticize her passionate gender studies major and make uncalled-for comments about her figure. She awaits the passage of despised time and looks to the door. 

   Her sugar daddy, a rich man named Max (Danny Defarrari), enters with a wife and a baby. 

   The movie unfolds the progressive mind and feelings of Danielle. The camera angling and direct focus of attention on specific people and points in a room is all a product of Danielle’s perspective.

   This is my absolute favorite “it could always be worse” movie. It takes the most dreaded teenage aspects of any get-together and twists them into Dante’s Inferno.  Danielle also breaks the barriers of the “picture perfect person”; a concept that is most delicious for us to discard this year. 

The People We Hate At The Wedding (2022)

  Nobody knows about this movie. My dad and I love it.

  This movie follows three different preparation processes for the wedding of rich and British Eloise (Cynthia Addai-Robinson). The twist? Two of the invitees would rather do anything else than attend. 

   They are her siblings, who lost their dad. They find Eloise, with a living dad, too rich, privileged, and eloquent after her sharing of his finances. They eventually cave to attend her wedding, though, and in the messiest way possible.

   Her sister, Alice (Kristen Bell), deals with personal trauma without the guaranteed companionship of Eloise. She eventually has two separate and simultaneous dates for the wedding. Neither knows about the other, but they plan their arrival at the same time. 

   Her brother, Paul (Ben Platt), relates to such a backstab. He is progressively and unwillingly pushed and pulled by his boyfriend Dominic to bring a third party into their relationship. Alice and Paul arrange to go to London for the wedding all while processing their devastating situations. 

   Eloise’s mother (Allison Janey)  prepares in her own special way. She spends her days bombarding Alice and Paul’s phones, begging them to attend the wedding before they agree. She expects a civilized, sweet family reunion. She likes to convince herself of a thought that margins between the fact that Eloise, Paul, and Alice are non-existent. She ends up reuniting with her ex-husband, Eloise’s father (Issach De Bankolé), and they have an affair after years of separation 

   When separate interests crash in London, Alice and Paul’s prior romantic situations dissolve. This is the way they eventually learn that what they have, damaged as it may be, is just that. Each other. 

    Maybe this moral is fitting to you. Maybe not. Relationships on Earth can be confusing and/or quite unforgivable. But the family’s iconic one-liners and eventual comfort in the mundane can inspire.     

Lady Bird (2017) 

   Burnt-out teenagers unite under one woman, and that is screenwriter Greta Gerwig. 

   In her film, Christine (Saoirse Ronan) is a Catholic school student yearning for comfort in her school, family, and financial situation. She has none. Her brain power is spent hoping that she can leave her hometown, Sacramento, to obtain a better life for herself and fly away from her problems. This becomes an opportunity for her. 

   She channels the power into taking on the persona of “Lady Bird,” a label that symbolizes her aspiring flight to the East Coast for college. She becomes quite rebellious and unapologetic under this name. She never conceals her emotions of anger or her impulse to shoplift.

  But she does not quite know what she yearns for away from the West Coast. That’s the thing. 

 Christine knows it is at least something, though. This something leads her to beautiful places, like hopefulness. She crushes on Danny (Lucas Hedges), the boy with a more stable familial situation that gave her that hope. She knew, then, that a world without fighting over the dinner table does exist in human form. This comforts her and leads her to believe that exposure to him will brighten her life. 

   But it also leads her to some upsetting places. In focusing so much on fleeing Sacramento, she forgets that special moments are meant to be special. Her mother (Laurie Metcalf) takes her dress shopping, a hopeful moment of bonding between the two. But because it is in the town, Christine does not realize how grateful she is to have such an experience at the time. She focuses on being anywhere else but there. 

   Her dreams do come true, though. The East Coast is obtained at a college in New York, but certainly at a cost. 

She comes to realize through her consequential college experience that special moments in Sacramento were meant to be special. The movie ends with her calling her mother.

   This movie exemplifies that aspirations do come true. That young minds have an undeniable place on this Earth to do good for themselves, regardless of circumstance. But it’s also a message that we carry worth when we regret what we yearn for, too. Our perception, old or new, carries a wonderful amount of worth alongside us. We can always want new things. 

Good Luck Charlie, It’s Christmas (2011)

  A throwback in its truest form. I paid actual money to own this movie on Google Play Movies and TV the year COVID struck. I would have any other year of my life, too. 

   The large Duncan family is preparing to visit Palm Springs to see the kids’ grandparents. Amy (Leigh Allen Baker), the mother, is unusually emotional and stressed about familial traditions and the trip. She is questioned quite often by her oldest daughter, Teddy (Bridget Mendler), but never given a proper response from her mother or her father Bob (Eric Allan Kramer). 

   Humorous moments involving the family’s two boys, PJ (Jason Dolley) and Gabe (Bradley Steven Perry), occur on the voyage to the plane. Youngest daughter Charlie (Mia Talerico) proves to be difficult to teeter along once her stroller breaks. Holidays festivities and getting together, so far, sets up to be a Mess.

   It continues to be as the flight is overbooked. To prove her individuality and capability as a young adult, Teddy offers to step off alone. Her mother does not see that capability in her. She runs off the plane with Teddy, which makes Teddy believe her mother does not quite understand her desires or trust her wit. But those things are very real to Teddy, as they are for many evolving teenagers.

   Their relationship proves to get stronger when they are forced to only have each other. They were unable to find a flight that would land in Palm Springs in time for Christmas. But they sure were determined. They rent janky cars older than Teddy, hitchhike in the middle of the road for rides, and board trains. All in all, the cars break down, Amy hikes in so much pain, and they get kicked off the train for Amy’s illness mid-ride.

   Teddy continues to encourage Amy, as well as support a stranger upset to be away from her mother on Christmas. 

   Amy later reveals to Teddy that she is expecting a sixth child, and that explains her abnormal behavior.  Teddy tries to understand this information while continuing the hike to Palm Springs. They arrive right on Christmas Day, and Amy reveals the news to everybody in a wholesome, supportive atmosphere. 

    Holiday wholesomeness is a guarantee in about every other frame of this film. So is learning to trust the kind spirit and ability of the young mind. 

  If you are among many in need of humor, honesty, and love, you undeniably deserve it. If you do not hear it at dinner this year, know it is always true. Now enjoy “going to the bathroom” as you stream these dear movies.