Despite being dragged to multiple Eagles games since I was a kid, I’ve never gotten into the game. The endlessly droning screams of excited fans, the way-too-eager highfives of the stranger next to me, the endlessly long waits in traffic lines: it’s just not my thing. The french-fries are good though, there’s no arguing that.

When my parents are gathered around to watch the Super Bowl and stuff their faces with chicken wings and soda, I usually go upstairs to watch the Puppy Bowl, Animal Planet’s pre-recorded version of the big game starring adorable pups. A large bunch of adoptable puppies running around a football-themed play area is much more appealing to me, even though I’m not exactly a dog person.

Filmed in October and sponsored by multiple companies who make pet related products, the Puppy Bowl XV was made to give adoptable puppies a time in the spotlight and inform the public of rescues. This year, while I did sit on my bed and “Awwww’d” at all the cute animals (this year featured a capybara, a sloth, and an African Grey Parrot), I did see a few select plays of the Super Bowl.

It was even lamer than usual.

The first few minutes were pretty interesting. There was a silence at dinner as the football flew through the air between the two teams as they attempted to gain ground from the others. But after ten minutes, it became a normal football game.

Last year, while the aggressive air in my usually relaxed house bothered me, at least things were happening. The Puppy Bowl had more action in it, and the puppies are just throwing their toys around. They had gimmicky fun mixed with legitimate heart while the Super Bowl was just a heartless commercialized mess. Even the ads, usually the talk of the town after they air, were either too weird to get behind or just eh.

Even I, someone who has barely any knowledge of this sport, knew the Patriots were going to win. From what I’ve heard, they always win. I’ve never actually heard of the Rams before. Rooting for the underdog, I was hoping for their win. But alas, this is no sappy sports movie.

The Pepsi-sponsored halftime show in Atlanta was passable, but the exclusion of Sweet Victory effectively ruined the whole thing for me. You cannot just hype something up that much only to give it only three seconds of screen time before pulling the plug. While the Puppy Bowl also excluded the inclusion of Spongebob, it did have kittens poking at piano keys. I’d take that over Adam Levine’s lackluster performance.

Tom Brady was there, he’s won a good amount of Super Bowls to the point people are tired of him. He has more rings than he can fit on his finger. Bumble, the MVP for the Puppy Bowl, was blind and deaf, but still won points for Team Fluff. If any player deserves a ring, Bumble’s your mutt, not any of those glorified wrestlers who barely managed to score.